To lyrical music the camera pans across the road, and comes across
a couple making love on the pavement. Pedestrians step over them.
- Carol (Carol)
- Oh Robert, tell me I'm beautiful.
- Robert (Terry J.)
- Oh you are, you are!
- Carol
- Oh Robert, do you mean that?
- Robert
- Of course I do.
- Carol
- Tou're not just saying that because I asked you?
- Robert
- Of course not.
- Carol
- Oh Robert ... Robert, are you sure it doesn't put you off?
- Robert
- What?
- Carol
- My father wanting to come and live with us.
- Robert
- No, of course I don't mind your father coming to live with us.
- Carol
- He wouldn't just be living with us.
- Robert
- What do you mean?
- Carol
- Well, he finds it very difficult to get to sleep on his own,
so I said he could sleep with us.
- Robert
- He wants to put his bed in our room?
- Carol
- No, no, of course not.
- Robert
- Oh good ...
- Carol
- Our bed is plenty big enough for three ...
- Robert
- What?
- Carol
- He'd just get into bed and go to sleep.
- Robert
- No. I'm not having that.
- Carol
- Oh Robert, I thought you loved me?
- Robert
- Well I do, but ...
- Carol
- Well, he wouldn't look.
- Robert
- He's bound to peek.
- Carol
- No, no, he wouldn't honestly.
- Robert
- No! No! No!!
Cut to the three of them in bed. Robert is in the middle. Father
wears striped pyjamas, the others are nude. There is an uncomfortable
silence.
- Father (Graham)
- You young couple just carry on. Take no notice of me ... (silence;
they smile half-heartedly) I don't want to feel as though I'm
getting in the way.
- Carol
- Oh no dad, you're not.
- Robert
- No, no.
- Father
- Good.
Silence again.
- Carol
- Well, I think I'll get to sleep.
- Father
- Are you sure?
- Carol
- Oh yes, I'm a bit tired after the wedding.
- Father
- Bob, what about you?
- Robert
- Oh yes, all right, yes.
- Father
- Oh well, I seem to be O/C lights.
- Carol
- (to Robert) Good night, darling.
- Robert
- Good night.
- Father
- Good night!
He switches the light off. It is pitch dark. There is a long pause,
then a strange scraping noise like a pencil being sharpened. The scraping
is followed by sawing and is eventually replaced by short sharp knocking
sounds. This goes on for some time.
- Carol
- Father. Father, what are you doing?
- Father
- I'm making a boat.
- Carol
- What?
- Father
- It's the Cutty Sark. It's a model I've been making in the dark
for some years now.
- Carol
- Well, wouldn't it be better with the light on?
- Father
- No, no, I'm making it in the dark, that;s the point.
There is a click. The light goes on. He looks disappointed. In
his hands is a completely shapeless mass of wood and nails.
- Father
- Oh dear, not as accurate as I thought.
- Robert
- It's not the Cutty Sark!
- Father
- Well it hasn't got its sails yet. Oh well I'll ... I'll have
a look at it in the dark room in the morning. Good night. (grunts
from the others who are already snuggling down; lights go off; silence)
Link to next sketch...in TV Series
Return to the sketches index