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I'm proud to bring you a selection of short films, long films, trailers and clips you can watch for free, right here online.
The Journey of Truesong (fantasy short)
An ambitious 5-minute fantasy piece shot on 16mm black and white film, The Journey of Truesong (17 MB, 5 min, Realplayer) tells the story of a young man who travels to hell and heaven in search of a way to revive his lost lover. A new tale told in the style of the storytellers of old. Written and directed by Garrett Gilchrist, photographed and edited by Tim Carras (Bonus Light Productions). Starring Ryan Bourne, Brandy Bourdeaux, Carl Stone, Uche Akotaobi. For photographs from the shoot, click here. The Journey of Truesong (17 MB, 5 min, Realplayer)
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 Gods of Los Angeles Trailers (Drama feature)
Trailer #1
(13.5 MB)
Trailer #2
(18.1 MB)
Two trailers for Orange Cow's romantic drama about the quest for the meaning of life and love in Los Angeles. Three years in production. Starring David Ashe, Cori Haisler, Katherine Hoagland, David Maddox, Mariana McConnell. Written and directed by Garrett Gilchrist.
Visit the website!
There are more clips from Gods of Los Angeles below.
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 Hey kids! It's Squiffy
the Derelict Cat! (Animated Comedy Clip)
Something's sure gonna happen! Here is a sneak preview of an animated cartoon by Garrett Gilchrist.
It's Squiffy the Derelict Cat!
(5.9 MB, Realplayer) Written by Jay Bauman and voiced by Garrett and Kara Dennison, this twisted tale of feline delinquence appears
in Jay's recently-released film "Clowns and
Suicide," from Blanc Screen Cinema. But you cool cats and kittens get to watch it right now! Watch
Squiffy get hit by a train! Watch him try to shoot a homeless man! Watch him solicit a prostitute, and
do battle with a 300 foot tall politician! He'll be your favorite homeless loser. Something's sure gonna
happen when you're with Squiffy the
Derelict Cat! (The final film Clowns and
Suicide contains more sequences with Squiffy, and won 8 awards including Best Feature at the 2003 Rewind Film Festival.) |
Trailer:
Radio Man: The Movie! (Comedy Mock Trailer)
Uh oh. Can the world withstand a movie starring our own Radio Man? I doubt it. But here's a trailer for one. There is not actually a movie to go with this ... it's just a trailer. That's all it is. From Orange Cow Productions and Garrett Gilchrist comes the most epic,
anticipated motion picture of 2002, 2003 and possibly 1982. Look out world, here comes Radio Man! (6mb, Realplayer) The story: when corporate
interest is shown in his radio program, our hero must finally leave his mom's house and journey to the
big city. He must evade the mob, reunite with his long lost brother, and win the hand of a girl he
likes. Actually none of that has anything to do with this trailer. Watch it anyway - it's Radio Man! With a special appearance by Deejay.
There are plenty more Radio Man clips later on in this page.
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For Science
A special-effects-filled time travel musical. Shot on black and white 16mm film, Tim Carras' For Science (6.67 MB, 5 min, Realplayer) tells the story of a young pilot (Gary Simpson) who has never gotten along with his mad scientist father (Jackie Penn), but who now may be too late to save him. Unless he can change time itself. With a great musical score by Tim Carras of Bonus Light Productions, who also wrote and directed. The cinematography, shooting and editing is by Garrett Gilchrist of Orange Cow Productions. For pictures from the film, click here.
For Science (6.67 MB, 5 min, Realplayer) |
 Ghostbusted 3 clip! (Quicktime)
In this clip from the film's exciting finale, amateur Ghostbusters Eddie (Mike Stoklasa), Seymour (Garrett Gilchrist) and Joe (Jonason Ho) meet the evil Walter the Ghostmaster (Warren Blyth). The film also stars Jason Santo.
With camerawork by Alan Winston. We slapped together one of these Ghostbusters-inspired comedy shorts every year at the Camp Rewind film festival in South Dakota. The film was directed by and this clip was edited by Garrett Gilchrist.
All dialogue was improvised by the cast.
Ghostbusted 3 is coming soon.
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Gods of Los Angeles: Lily meets Clifford clip (Quicktime, 11.6 MB)
In this clip from our dramatic feature, Lily (Cori Haisler) meets Clifford (David Maddox), whose girlfriend has just broken up with him. Clifford, needing to assert himself as a man, has said that the next girl he sees, he's going to ask out, and he's not going to take no for an answer. Lily, an innocent-looking girl with some emotional problems, is the next girl he sees. So, Clifford comes up to her, and, well, watch the scene.
Visit the Gods of Los Angeles website. |
Gods of Los Angeles: dinner scene clip
(25.1 MB, Quicktime)
Another clip from our dramatic feature, Gods of Los Angeles. In this scene, Clifford (David Maddox) has dinner with the mysterious Martha (Julie Kenworth) ... who has a couple of things to say about the way Clifford talks to women.
The scene features cinematography by Jason Gutierrez and makeup by Rebecca Hong. It was written, directed and edited by Garrett Gilchrist.
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 Gods of Los Angeles: Paper Dolls clip
(Quicktime, 12.4 MB)
Another clip from our dramatic feature, Gods of Los Angeles. In this clip, Shy Phil (Davi Kutz) has started to write a song about two paper dolls ... a song that may hold some meaning for Bruce (David Ashe) and Lily (Cori Haisler). With Katherine Hoagland as Rhonda.
Written, directed, edited and with cinematography by Garrett Gilchrist.
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"The Lord of the Sword" - From Excaliburger.
(38.8 MB, Quicktime 6 MPEG-4)
Completely reedited and remastered as a tribute to the late Niket Doshi. (1980-2001)
This is a new edit of several scenes from Excaliburger, done in December 2004, as part of a 30-minute tribute to Niket Doshi. Niket was a great friend, one of the kindest, most intelligent people I was ever lucky enough to know. He is deeply missed.
In this remastered and reedited version of his scenes from Excaliburger, Niket plays the Lord of the Sword, who engages in a verbal duel with Spanky (Garrett Gilchrist), and a very physical duel with David Ashe (as an annoyed customer). Guest starring Cecil the dragon.
Fight choreographed by Niket Doshi and David Ashe. Camerawork by David Brown and Garrett Gilchrist. Music by David Ashe and Tal Pearson.
Starring Niket Doshi, Garrett Gilchrist, David Ashe. With Pete Guerrera, Steve Nagy, Tom Vandevoort, Sarah Rowe.
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Blanc Screen Cinema presents INDULGENCE (trailer)
INDULGENCE Trailer
(10 megs, 4 minutes, Realplayer) "Indulgence" follows the story of Melf, a straight-arrow kid who doesn't drink, smoke, do drugs or even drink coffee. But as his life seems to spin out of control, he throws his fears out the window and has the strangest night of his life, indulging in alcohol, drugs, sex, and paint ... and if he survives, he'll never be the same. A new feature film from director Jay Bauman (winner Best Feature, Rewind 2003, for "Clowns and Suicide") and starring (and with cinematography by) Orange Cow Productions' Garrett Gilchrist. For more information, visit the Indulgence webpage. INDULGENCE Trailer
(10 megs, 4 minutes, Realplayer) |
Music For the Mind Ballet (Drama Silent Short)
Music for the Mind Ballet (25.4 MB, 16min, Realplayer) A favorite Orange Cow short from 2001. The dialogue-less short stars Jamie "Reoke" Odum as Genny, a college student who becomes so overwhelmed with stress that she splits into two personalities ... and has to live with herself. It features some nice trick photography and splitscreen work. Enjoy ...
Music for the Mind Ballet(25.4 MB, 16min, Realplayer)
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Torgo and the Quest for Fuck! (Comedy Short)
(Director Jay Bauman, Blanc Screen Cinema)
Torgo and the Quest for Fuck (14 megs MB, 5 1/2 minutes, Realplayer) Slapped together without a script in a couple hours at the end of the first annual Camp Rewind film festival in 2001, this offensive little all-improv short stars the cast of Florida's Queequeg Films (Jeremy Gardner, Natalie Sanders, Ryan Winford) and our own Garrett Gilchrist. It was directed by Jay Bauman, of Blanc Screen Cinema. The plot follows two wacky kidnappers as they attempt to find a suitable mate for their retarded brother. Torgo! He'll drool his way into your heart. This is the remastered version, cleaned up and fixed up by Garrett Gilchrist in 2003. See some pictures from the movie here. Torgo and the Quest for Fuck: The Special Edition (5 min, 14 megs, Realplayer)
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 New video! Gods of L.A. Teaser: "Jules on Film" (Quicktime, 9.7 MB)
This unusual teaser for Gods of Los Angeles consists of a deleted scene from the film. The scene wasn't good enough to be put in the film, but it makes for an interesting teaser for it - because it's all about movies!
This clip stars Mariana McConnell as Jules Kirschner, and Cori Haisler as Lily Benton. Cinematography was by Jason Gutierrez. Sound recording and boom operation was by Jason Gutierrez. Camerawork was by Garrett Gilchrist, who also wrote, directed and edited the film.
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 GHOST BUSTED (Comedy Documentary Short)
(Dir. Garrett
Gilchrist, Orange Cow Productions and GMP Pictures, 22.8 megs, 18 minutes long, Realplayer)
Collection of random footage shot at the 2001 Camp Rewind festival. Lots of amateur groups
goofing around, lots of Ghostbusters references. Editing by Mike Stoklasa. Jason Santo, Mike Stoklasa,
Jay Bauman, Natalie Sanders, Ryan Winford, Jon Ashby, Alan Winston ... lots of people. Visit the website!
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 Ghostbusted 2! (Comedy Documentary Feature)
(51 minutes, 84 mb, Realplayer) What's 51 minutes long and calculated to drive you utterly insane? What's absolutely horrible and yet strangely entertaining? That's right, the entire feature-length epic, Ghostbusted 2, is available for screening online. Like the original Ghost Busted, this started as an honest attempt to shoot a comedy film with a Ghostbusters theme while at the Camp Rewind film festival. However, like the original, I completely failed to shoot a Ghostbusters movie, and wound up with a lot of random bizarre documentary footage instead. It's an improvised comedy film shot documentary style, as I follow around various funny filmmaking people, and they attempt half-assedly to entertain you without knowing what the hell they should do. The movie is not about anything in particular, but contains vague references to ghosts. Yes, it is 84 freaking megs. I told you, it's feature-length. Enjoy. Starring David Ashe, Jay Bauman, Lisa Renley, Mike Stoklasa, Garrett Gilchrist, John Brugmann, Rich Evans, Jonathan Margheim, Warren Blyth, Jonason Ho, Dan Gorgone, C.C. Chapman, Joe Vaccariello, Marc Linn, Bobby Brown, Anthony Stella, Justin Bielawa. For pictures from the film, click here.
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Talking to People About Star Wars! (Documentary Short)
A documentary for anyone who loves or hates Star Wars, or both. Talking to People About Star Wars. (36 MB, 25 min, Realplayer) Shot in 2002 during the Gorilla Interrupted, Gods of Los Angeles and Ghostbusted 2 shoots. I simply relaxed and asked all your favorite amateur actors about Star Wars. They had all been big Star Wars fans as kids, and most of them would no longer call themselves such. Sure The Phantom Menace was a bad film, but could a movie possibly cause so much pain as to ruin a childhood dream? This one raises more questions than it answers and has some funny bits in it. Enjoy. I certainly do. Directed by Garrett Gilchrist and starring Rich Evans, Lisa Renley, Jesse Sorgatz, David Ashe, Mike Stoklasa, Jay Bauman, John Brugmann, Cori Haisler, Harry Pottash. Talking to People About Star Wars (36 MB, 25 min, Realplayer)
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 Two-Part "Instructional" Video: Pirates of Film! (Comedy Documentary Long Short)
Pirates of Film: Part One (18 min., 30 MB, Realplayer) Pirates of Film: Part Two (25 min., 40.5 MB, Realplayer) What's a nice cinematographer doing in a video like this? Transcend Entertainment cinematographer Jason Gutierrez teams up with Orange Cow asshole Garrett Gilchrist for a full 45-minute instructional video. Watch as they fail to be either informative or funny on the subject of lighting. Giving up, they take to the streets to see if people are interested in amateur film. This is where it gets interesting. Forgetting the teaching joke, they try to learn something themselves. Watch as Jason questions Super Mario's sexuality! Watch as women run away from Garrett in terror, and men come very close to punching him! Watch Jason make out with a mannequin head! It's time for fun and adventure on the high seas of Los Angeles, with Jason and Garrett, the Pirates of Film! Part One, (18 min., 30 MB, Realplayer) Part Two (25 min., 40.5 MB, Realplayer)
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 He's back! In spite of popular demand!
RADIO MAN: THE WEB SERIES
Episode 1: "I am on the Video"
(9 minutes, 19 MB, requires Quicktime 6)
Radio Man has ... against all better judgement and sanity ... been a recurring feature at my other site, FFrevolution.com, since it started in 2001. He's done 10 radio episodes, 3 half-hour radio specials, and 6 live stand-up acts ... along with a trailer for an unmade film. And I say, the best kind of horse to beat is a dead horse, so I'm proud to announce that Radio Man has finally done what I thought he'd never do ... he's become a video man. Strangely, he's still doing the same old radio show. Except we can see him now.
In the first episode of this new web series, Radio Man reunites with his old friend Deejay, and learns some important lessons about his own sexuality. He also performs the "Flower Song." Twice. Radio Man's mom's fish are also involved.
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 RADIO MAN: THE WEB SERIES
Episode 2: "Deejay Has a Drug Problem"
(8 minutes, 16.7 MB, requires Quicktime 6)
In this very special after school special, Radio Man has to confront his best friend ... because his best friend has a drug problem. That's right folks, Deejay is hooked on the smack, and only Radio Man can save him. This very special episode tackles the rampant drug problem in our country. Also: Radio Man sings "The Potato/11 song!" Don't miss it! Or do. See if I care.
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RADIO MAN: THE WEB SERIES
Episode 3: "Radio Man Finds a Mate"
(9.5 minutes, 28.7 MB, requires Quicktime 6)
BEWARE! The MONSTER seeks a MATE! In this episode, Radio Man explains why his shows have been a bit crap lately - he's been distracted. You see, Radio Man is in LOVE! Yes, love is in the air, and you'll find out all the creepy details, as we head to the inevitable conclusion. Plus, Radio Man sings his new hit song, "The King of All Fish," and some other songs.
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 Radio Man Live!
(8 mb, Realplayer)
Oh dear. It's our own Radio Man, and he's live onstage, performing at USC's coffehouse and poet/musician hangout, GroundZero. Well, he's not so much performing as he's destroying the stage. The story goes: Jason Gutierrez convinced Garrett to crash an open mic night ... he had no plan, no idea what to do, and as soon as he arrived he suddenly found himself onstage. He proceeded to wing it. Garrett called it a terrible performance, but planned to do more and better in the future. And you get to see him confuse and annoy open mike host Alexia, and accidentally steal and destroy some random person's guitar!
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Radio Man: Live Without Pants!
(10 min, 35 MB, Quicktime)
Radio Man (Garrett Gilchrist) performs his standup act for the third time, live at USC's Groundzero coffeehouse. The last time, he was thrown offstage before he could even perform. This time, Radio Man takes off his pants. The pants are off, and no holds are barred. Watch Radio Man talk about eating paint! Watch Radio Man try to eat his own pants! Shiver with glee as Radio Man puts on 3-d glasses and sings his hit single, "Space Hat," with guitar accompaniment by his manager, Jason Gutierrez.
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Live Video: Radio Man is a Poet! (Realplayer)
Garrett Gilchrist appears in his sixth standup comedy act as Radio Man, who stumbles onstage to bare his soul as a poet, performing deep, thoughtful poems about loneliness and the 1980s cartoon series "He-Man And the Masters of the Universe." Performed at USC's Groundzero coffee house.
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 SUGARHIGH CRUSADE animations (Animated Clips)
(Dir. Garrett Gilchrist, Orange Cow
Productions, 12 megs, 3 minutes long, Realplayer)
A series of four test animations,
shot on 16mm film, starring the characters from Garrett Gilchrist's comic strip The Sugarhigh Crusade, and space hero Lucky Xenon. The titles are "Blobby
Thing Does Stuff," "Toshiro," "Joel and Miss #749," and "Lucky Xenon: The Sugarhigh Saga."
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 GROINS OF DARKNESS (Documentary Short)
(Dir. Jay Bauman, Blanc
Screen Cinema, 7.38 MB, 5 min., Realplayer)
A documentary about the bizarre,
possibly cursed shooting of the amateur comedy feature "Gorilla Interrupted" (Mike Stoklasa, GMP
Pictures, 2002). A historic, all-star collaboration between three groups -- GMP Pictures, Blanc Screen
Cinema and Orange Cow Productions - "Gorilla Interrupted" was intended as the ultimate in schlock
comedy. Instead it turned into an exercise in illness, injury and pain. The finished movie is quite
funny, though. It even inspired its own video game, "Moron Kombat." The plot concerns four would-be
heroes attempting to save the world from an alien invasion. Mike Stoklasa, Jay Bauman, Rich Evans,
Garrett Gilchrist, Lisa Renley, Laura Dagys. (Best Documentary nomination, Rewind 2002.) Visit the website!
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 HOUSE OF FUN promo (Music Video)
(Dir. Garrett Gilchrist, Orange Cow Productions,
9.5 megs, 3 minutes long, Realplayer)
A music video of footage from Orange Cow's
movies from 2000-2002, set to "House of Fun" by Madness.
 Gorilla Interrupted Exclusive: David Ashe vs. Jay Bauman! (Comedy Clip)
Double your comedy with twice the David Ashe.
(3 mb, Realplayer.) We are proud to present, thanks to GMP pictures' Mike Stoklasa, not
just one, but TWO completely different (and hilarious) takes on the same scene. Dave was asked to mail
in a cameo for Stoklasa's unreleased epic schlock masterpiece, ("Gorilla Interrupted," which Dave had done a script rewrite for.
I wrote him a gratuitious little scene he could play, and Dave sent in two versions of a scene ... one
in which he played it normally, and one in which he played it as a flamboyantly gay Marxist. Mike edited
together both versions. I'm not sure which he intends to use in the final cut, but I'm proud to present
them both. You decide! Watch the video already! (3 mb,
Realplayer) It's the former Orange Cow star vs. Blanc Screen Cinema's Jay Bauman, as Jay tries to call
up a girl he likes, Julie, and gets Ashe instead. |
 Clips from The Animal Game (Drama/Comedy/Experimental Feature Clips)
(Dir. Garrett Gilchrist, Orange
Cow Productions, Realplayer)
Two clips from Orange Cow's 1999 improvised
documentary-style drama/comedy about an amateur film shoot gone horribly wrong. A feature film shot entirely in one night without a script, this was a daring and experimental film for us at the time, and though hard to watch it remains one of my favorite things we've done, for some reason. Garrett Gilchrist, David
Ashe, Ben Sipprell, Justin Bielawa, Tal Pearson, Steve Nagy.
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Sound Bites
Sketches from "Dr. Fred Strikes Back":
Listen with REALAUDIO
Demonic Possession and You
Mucho Man Interview
A Very Wonderful Cast Update
"Dr. Fred Strikes Back" sound clips: WAV
Perhaps you've never thought of your breakfast cereal as a threat to national security.
Art thou bored? Dive into a Dim Jim!
Fyrpesha, fyrpesha.
Fyrpesha here ...
Fyrpesha!
Hey man, how's about a nice Hawaiian ...
Isn't that what movies are all about?
... to bring you "A Minute in the Life of a Tree."
What a silly bit. And now, here's another!
And Magical Princess Mumblebee never returned from the land of the wobbly gumdrops.
I have no taste.
Help control the viewing population: have yourself spayed or neutered. Goodnight.
"Dr. Fred Strikes Back" sound clips: REALAUDIO
They say a cow is the sum of his experiences ...
Monologue from "The Snowman" [art film]
From the first Dr. Fred show:
| ABSURD.WAV | 19 Kb
| "It's our talent for the absurd."
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| BIGFAT-1.WAV |
33.5 Kb
| "Good evening, and welcome to 'A Big Fat Waste of Your Time.'"
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| BIGFAT-2.WAV |
31.2 Kb
| "Thank you. This has been 'A Big Fat Waste of Your Time.'"
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| BOINK1.WAV |
49.6 Kb
| "Sugar Schlockins, fun to eat, that sugar high just can't be beat..."
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| BOINK2.WAV |
51 Kb
| "Sugar Schlockins, you're never full, I bet you can't eat just one bowl!"
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| BOINK3.WAV |
15 Kb
| "They're Tragically Malicious!"
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| DONTMIND.WAV |
27.3 Kb
| "Plastic Feet?"
"Don't mind if I do!"
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| KNEECAPS.WAV |
34 Kb
| "Then we can break his kneecaps!"
"YAAAY!"
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| THECHIEF.WAV |
19.8 Kb
| "We, uh, try not to, Vic."
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| WARSUCKS.WAV |
28.6 Kb
| "War sucks, doesn't it?"
"Yup."
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| WRNPEACE.WAV |
52.4 Kb
| "Is there a God?"
"Beats the hell outta me!"
"Yeah."
"Bleah."
"Whoa."
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Back to Orange Cow Productions
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Lover's Poison (Drama Short) 
STRIPPED AWAY (Drama short) 
EXCALIBURGER trailer (Comedy Feature) 
Terry Pratchett's MORT (Animated Fantasy Short)
I'VE BEEN MOCKED ENOUGH (Comedy Short)
THE CANCER (Drama Short)
BEAUTIFUL ZELDA 
Clips from Dr. Fred's The Phantom Movie (Comedy Feature Clips)
Clip from "Dr. Fred Strikes Back" (1998-99) - "KILL" and "Tellychubbies" (Dir. Garrett Gilchrist, Orange Cow Productions, Realplayer)