Things I Say

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Garrett Gilchrist
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Re: Things I Say

Post: # 7295Post Garrett Gilchrist
Sat Jul 11, 2015 4:19 am

The son of Skywalker must not become a Brony.

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Garrett Gilchrist
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Re: Things I Say

Post: # 7296Post Garrett Gilchrist
Sat Jul 11, 2015 4:20 am

Beach Boys corrections: In “I Get Around,” Mike Love starts off by stating “I’m getting bugged driving up and down the same old strip. I’ve got to find a new place, where the kids are hip.” Since Love has now been performing those lyrics for a full fifty years, clearly any major life changes were not as much of a priority as the song implied. Also, Mike Love has never been hip, or hung around anyplace where kids were hip. We regret the error.

Beach Boys corrections: Also in “I Get Around,” Mike Love states “My buddies and me are getting real well known. Yeah, the bad guys know us and they leave us alone.” This would imply that the Beach Boys are well known for being tough and feared by the criminal element. This was never the case. While it may have been true that the Beach Boys were “getting real well known” at the time the song was written, it was not for the fear they struck in the hearts of “bad guys.” Today, a more accurate reading of the facts would simply state that, “Despite any creative disagreements that cause us to no longer perform together, my business partners (in The Beach Boys and Brother Records) and myself have been well known now for a period of fifty years, due to a lengthy track record of writing and performing popular and critically-acclaimed singles and albums, mainly in the 1960s and more sporadically in the 70s and 80s.” We regret the error.

Beach Boys corrections: In the SMiLE album, Mike Love. We regret the error.

Beach Boys corrections: “Got To Know the Woman” was official Beach Boys policy at the time, but has since been corrected. Knowing the woman is now recommended but not mandatory.

Beach Boys corrections: In “All Summer Long,” it’s stated that it “Won’t be long ‘til summertime is through.” This is not true for the Beach Boys, who are locked in an “Endless Summer.” A line has been added correcting this, stating “Not for us now!” Thank you for your understanding.

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Garrett Gilchrist
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Re: Things I Say

Post: # 7297Post Garrett Gilchrist
Sat Jul 11, 2015 4:20 am

The year is 2058. Tragedy strikes, just as the Beach Boys predicted. Now everybody has an ocean, across the USA. The United States is flooded and sinks to the ocean floor. Over 250 million people die. Hundreds of years of art, culture and human history, gone.
The year is 2285. Tragedy strikes, and The Beach Boys are seen as true prophets of doom. They are all California Girls now. All around this great big world. The former state of California is the only safe, habitable nation left on Earth. The male population has dwindled to negligible levels. The earth’s population, now almost entirely female, is concentrated in the nation of California. Overpopulation in the desert leads to water shortages, famine and unimaginable poverty. Unable to reproduce, the human race will have nearly died out within a generation.

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Garrett Gilchrist
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Re: Things I Say

Post: # 7298Post Garrett Gilchrist
Sat Jul 11, 2015 4:21 am

New Year’s Resolutions:
1. Conquer fear
2. Conquer hate
3. Turn dark night into day
4. Make my blazing saddle a torch to light the way

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Garrett Gilchrist
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Re: Things I Say

Post: # 7299Post Garrett Gilchrist
Sat Jul 11, 2015 4:24 am

10 Reasons Why Cracked. com’s Snarky, Unresearched List Articles Will Result in a Generation Being Misinformed About Everything

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Garrett Gilchrist
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Re: Things I Say

Post: # 7300Post Garrett Gilchrist
Sat Jul 11, 2015 4:24 am

I was working in the lab, late one night. It wasn’t as spooky or entertaining as you might be led to believe.

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Garrett Gilchrist
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Re: Things I Say

Post: # 7301Post Garrett Gilchrist
Sat Jul 11, 2015 4:24 am

“I like big butts,” he lied. #SixWordShortStories

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Garrett Gilchrist
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Re: Things I Say

Post: # 7302Post Garrett Gilchrist
Sat Jul 11, 2015 4:24 am

When I was a kid, I’d sing the wrong lyrics to The Beach Boys’ “I Get Around.” I knew they were the wrong words, but I never bothered to figure out the right ones. So I’d sing “I’m a real cool hick / I’d make a real good brick.”

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Garrett Gilchrist
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Re: Things I Say

Post: # 7303Post Garrett Gilchrist
Sat Jul 11, 2015 4:24 am

Couldn’t We Riot #PunkMuppets

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Garrett Gilchrist
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Re: Things I Say

Post: # 7304Post Garrett Gilchrist
Sat Jul 11, 2015 4:25 am

The bird population of Marvel comics is protected by the Agents of S.H.O.E.

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